Hell Hath No Fury
by Adamantwrites
Summary: Why did Julia Bulette hate Ben so much that she wanted to destroy him through his son? This is a prequel that gives a possible reason. Disclaimer: All recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. All original characters and plot are the property of the author. No copyright infringement in intended.
1. Chapter 1

Hell Hath No Fury

Part 1

_"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned." William Congreve_

Ben ran his lips along Julia's neck and she arched her back in delight; she loved him although she knew not to tell him so. He had come to mean more to her than any man she had known and she had known so many. But Ben Cartwright was the only one who treated her as more than a commodity.

"I have to go now, Julia," Ben said, getting up and going to dress after kissing her once more.

"I've heard the rumors, Ben." Julia sat up, pulling the sheets around her. He looked at her, puzzled. "About you and Marie De Marigny. Did you think I wouldn't? Do you think that my life is so different from hers that I wouldn't know how much time you've been spending with her under the guise of visiting Marius Angeville?" She pushed the loose strands of hair off her face.

Ben's face clouded. "I don't know what business it is of yours if I have a friendship with Mme. DeMarigny." He pulled on his shirt and began buttoning it and then tucked it in his waistband.

"Friendship you call it? I call it foolish, She is nothing more than a thin-nosed snob, her and her cousin, D'Arcy. Well, I could tell you a few things…" Julia became more furious as she looked at Ben and thought of his kissing Marie and telling her how beautiful she was-and Julia hated Marie, had hated her even before she knew that Ben was infatuated with her.

Julia had first met Ben Cartwright years ago when he, as a young merchant seaman, had put into port in New Orleans. Julia was working at a small seaside bar as a bar maid and if she wasn't offended by the sailor, if he wasn't too drunk or stank too much, she let him taste her favors but only for a high fee; she knew she was beautiful and the men couldn't expect to have her cheaply. And Julia was saving to start her own place. She had visions of how grand it would be and that was what kept her going. After all, she had left her schooling-she didn't need to be educated to lie on her back and she had a natural aptitude for math so she saw no point in going on with it. Her "Julia's Palace" was what kept her working at the small bar that smelled of fish and men who had been out to sea for too long and hadn't washed for months.

And one afternoon when there wasn't much business, a young man in a pea coat, a striped shirt underneath it and wearing a watch cap sat down at one of the tables and asked for a beer.

"You're a pretty one," he said when she brought the beer over. He picked up the mug and looked at it. "A clean glass?"

Julia had laughed. She told him that yes, it was clean. Only when the place became busy were the glasses only dunked in a bucket of water and filled again. The merchant seaman had said that he'd have to learn to do his drinking early in the afternoon then and they shared a laugh. And because they weren't busy and because she liked this handsome young man with the friendly, dark eyes and the deep voice that warmed her like a good whiskey, Julia sat down and they talked for an hour or so until the place began to fill. The bartender called to her and Julia stood up but before she left him, Julia placed her hand on his arm and told him to come by after one in the morning if he wanted to see her and talk some more. "My name is Julia," she said before she left and he said that his name was Ben. He turned his head to watch her walk away and admired her well-shaped legs and her tiny waist and decided that he would be back.

Since the young sailor was to be in New Orleans for three days before his ship set off again, Julia spent every moment she could with him; he stayed at her small apartment on the second floor over the bar and after managing not to work as much as she usually did, Julia spent the days teasing and playing with Ben Cartwright, feeling like the young girl she was, and the nights sheltered in his arms where he told her of his dream to travel out west and to own some of the promise land, to raise cattle and to live in the fresh clean air and sun of that wide-open territory. And Julia told him of her plans of one day owning a grand gambling salon that she would name "Julia's Palace" and she would serve only the best whiskey, brandy and champagne and hire beautiful women to work for her at the tables. And the upstairs of the "Palace," she told him, would have elegantly furnished rooms in case one of her girls wanted to take a man upstairs and she, herself, would have the most elegant chamber of all and she would never have to be at a man's mercy again. Never. She would only take the lovers she desired.

Ben would stroke her hair as she lay with her head on his broad chest and listened to his strong heart beat and Julia had never been as happy as she had been over those three days and nights. But the time came for Ben to go, to leave again, to ship out and Julia felt a desperation she hadn't known she could; it was as if the ground was sliding away beneath her and she was falling into a deep, black abyss. She clung to him and for the first time as an adult, she cried.

"Now, Julia," Ben said, holding her, trying to soothe her and comfort her as she sobbed. "It's not as if you didn't know I would have to leave."

"Oh, Ben, I'll be so lonely without you. I don't know how I'll bear it." She felt embarrassed for losing her self-restraint, something on which she prided herself. Julia always tried to distance herself from emotional entanglement-it was how she had survived all she had suffered as a child. And now she had found someone she could love, someone she did love, and he was going away, leaving her.

"I'll be back," Ben said. "In a few months' time, I promise you that I'll return here. I promise." And with that, he kissed young Julia goodbye. But before he pulled away from her, he looked into her brown eyes and told her that she was by far the most beautiful woman he had ever known and that if by the time he had given up his merchant seamanship, she was still there, perhaps things could go further between them. He half meant it but it was also a way to ease the parting, not just for her but for himself as well. Julia told him to wait a moment and went back into her small bedroom. Ben stood by the door, anxious. He needed to report to his ship-they wouldn't wait for him-that he knew.

"Here, Ben" Julia said, handing him a silk hanky with lace tatting along the borders.

He looked down and saw a lip print on it. Then he looked back to Julia; she had rouged her lips and kissed the handkerchief. He bent down and kissed Julia again. "I'll keep your kiss with me always," he said and tucked it into his peacoat's inside pocket.

He turned to leave and then glanced back and seeing Julia, the tears still fresh on her white cheeks, he turned and violently pulled her to him and kissed her, then held her against him, his lips in her hair, and without another word, turned and left. Julia ran out onto the front balcony of her little apartment and watched Ben Cartwright walk back to the docks until he disappeared into the heavy fog that rolled in from the gulf, the air outside having the slight chill of lost love on it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2**

Julia worked at the bar and waited for Ben to return but as time passed, as months passed, Julia came to believe that Ben Cartwright would never come to her again and she became angry with herself for opening her heart to him. She convinced herself that he was no different than any other man and she had given herself to him freely and had nothing to show for their time together. But still, at night, as she lay alone trying to sleep in the suffocating humidity and heat of the New Orleans' summer, she would think back on the time they had spent together. She would pull up in her mind Ben's smile, gentle eyes and his persuasive lips on hers. She would tremble remembering the touch of his strong hands with their long fingers-so elegant and gentle. And Julia would feel the tears steal out from the corners of her eyes. "Don't think about him," she would tell herself. But she couldn't help but do otherwise. And one morning she dreamed in the wee hours that he was there, kissing her to wake her up but when she opened her eyes, she realized that it had been a dream and yet the pain of his absence upon awakening was so sharp that it was as if a knife had been slid between her ribs.

One night she went upstairs, heavy with exhaustion, to her apartment and there was a small package outside her door wrapped in heavy, brown paper. It had been tied with string and had odd markings on it as if stamped by many hands in at least three languages. Suddenly she was sure she knew the sender and after lighting a lamp, she carefully examined the writing. It was from 1st Mate, B. Cartwright. Julia sat down at the small vanity she had in her room and with shaking hands, used her small pair of scissors to cut the string and unfolded the heavy paper. It revealed a wooden box and she opened it. Inside, was an envelope. She lifted it up and then below she saw what made her catch her breath. Tucked in the red satin was a pair of earrings, wrought gold with a single golden, teardrop-shaped pearl dangling below.

Julia held them up to her ears as she looked in the mirror, then quickly undid one of the earrings she was wearing and slipped in one of the pearl earrings. It seemed to glow next to her face. Then Julia turned to a small pouch that was also in the box. She lifted it up and immediately recognized the weight of coins. She opened the pouch and poured the contents on the vanity top. Ten gold coins. Julia gasped. She quickly picked up the envelope, slid her finger underneath the flap which broke the seal and unfolded it. In Ben's elegant handwriting, she read:

_My dearest Julia, _

_I hope this letter finds you well. I have thought many times of you and the tears you shed at our parting so I send two teardrops back to you, eternized in the pearls. Wear them for me when I see you again. I hope that you will be able to use the small amount of coinage I have sent you. Yes, my darling, they have the face of a foreign emperor on them but they are still worth a great deal. _

_I shall be back in New Orleans within the next four months. I shall be signing on with another captain, a Captain Stoddard and his clipper ship. I do not know in what position I am to be hired but my captain on the Resonance has decided to become a privateer and I fear trouble. Captain Stoddard, although not a likeable man, appears to be a decent one. _

_I look forward to being with you again and as each day passes, I grow more and more eager to view your great beauty and to hear your voice next to me in the dark. Take care, mon ange._

_My love to you, _

_Benjamin_

And that night, Julia slept with Ben's letter under her pillow.

The next morning, the sun blazing, Julia took the coins Ben had sent her and went to the bank where she set up the authority to write drafts. She was very nervous and had made a point to wear a rather plain frock and hat to appear what she considered more respectable and she wore the pearl earrings from Ben. The man at the bank was overly polite but Julia was nervous-he kept looking at her in an odd way. And then as she stood and thanked him, he smiled at her in a lewd manner and said that if she needed anything else, anything at all, he would be willing to help her. She was such a pretty, young minx and he pinched her cheek.

Julia knew some vulgar words from being around the sailors that she often used against them-they could scorch the bristles off a pig's back but she held herself together and instead, slapped his hand away and icily told him, "Thank you for your generous offer, but no." But as she left the bank and tried to gather herself, she noticed her gloved hands shaking. Ah, but she wished Ben were there already. He would hold her and all her cares would be gone, dissolved by his masculine power. It was so frightening to be so alone in the world, in the world of men who had all the power.

Julia walked briskly over to the gambling establishment, La Palais de la Chance, owned by Edouard D'Arcy. It was the grandest place in New Orleans and Julia knew that all the wealthy men went there in the evenings as a way to find entertainment and to take them away from their wives. Julia knew that women were allowed there but she also knew that D'Arcy hired women as well as men to run his tables, beautiful women, and if she was able to work for him, then she could possibly learn more about running such a fine place to her own benefit.

It was only ten in the morning but Julia walked into the front doors of the establishment and went to the man who was behind the bar-an elegant piece of furniture, heavy maple with a pink marble counter top. Julia looked at her reflection in the large, gilded, framed mirror above it. Her walk from the bank had given her cheeks a flush and the perspiration gave her skin a luminous glow.

"Bonjour, Madame," the man said to her. Julia could see the admiration of her beauty in his face.

"Mademoiselle," she corrected with a small smile. It wouldn't do to be supercilious with him; she hoped to work with him.

"Excusez-moi, Mademoiselle. Que puis-je faire pour vous?" The man looked her up and down appraisingly and confidence flooded her. Here her beauty would help her.

Julia decide that she would switch to English so that the man would know that she would be able to converse with a man, no matter what language he spoke. "I would like very much to speak with M. D'Arcy. Is he available?"

"Who may I say is asking for him-other than la femme la plus ravissant que je crois que j'ai vu de vre." The man came around from behind the long bar.

Julia lightly laughed. "I find it hard to believe that more beautiful women that I have never graced such a marvelous establishment. Please tell him that it is Mlle. Bulette. Julia Bulette."

"Oui, Mademoiselle. won't you have a seat?" The man pulled out a chair for her at one of the small round gambling tables. "I'll be back shortly."

Julia pulled off her gloves, folded them on the table beside her bag and waited and looked around at the golden room with its lush, shirred draperies and gilded furniture. Yes, Julia thought to herself. This is where I belong, in a place like this.

The man returned and told her that M. D'Arcy would be there shortly and asked if she would like a drink. Julia's instincts told her that this may be a test; no one with a yen for alcohol would be hired. Julia had seen too many women at the seaside bars who had become slovenly drunks and therefore had been relegated to working just to pay for their addiction but along with that, she had seen many of the women destroyed by their addiction for the opium that some of the sailors smuggled into the country. Julia was determined that she would never be one of them. So she asked for a glass of cool water. The man smiled and agreed that it would be a warm day-very warm, and he brought her a glass of pristine water. He put it in front of her and he told her that his name was Franz.

As Julia sipped from her glass, she heard noise to her left and soon a tall, handsome man stood beside her. "May I sit down?" he asked in his deep voice with a charming French accent.

"Please do," Julia said, looking up at him from under her lashes. She knew that it was just a formality. She recognized Edouard D'Arcy, his sensual face that expressed his desire for carnal pleasures and knew that since it was his place, he didn't need to ask permission to sit down.

Giving a quick bow, the man sat. "Franz has informed me that you have asked to see me. Had I known that such a beautiful woman waited, I would have wrapped up my business sooner. What may I do for you? You have only to ask."

Julia looked at the man who relaxed in the chair opposite her, his long legs stretched out under the table and she felt one of his feet touch hers and stay pressed up against it. Julia knew how to play this game.

"I have come to offer my services to you." She sat, touching the glass in front of her with both hands, a smile playing on her lips.

"I can only hope what those services might be. My imagination is leading me to all sorts of scenarios, yes? But, since I need a faro dealer, do you know that game?"

Julia had the impression that he meant a "game" other than faro. "I am familiar with the game, yes. And I learn quickly."

"I am sure you do. Would you care to work for me?" He smiled at Julia. She was incredibly beautiful, delicate but already hardened and Edouard weighed whether or not she would come to his bed easily or if he would have to "court" her in his way. He could sense that Julia wouldn't respond to threats of sleeping with him or being let go-she would quit. She was cunning, Edouard could see that, but she would help him in his business and first and foremost, Edouard D'Arcy was a businessman; his first love was money.

D'Arcy stood up. "Franz," he said. "Please show our new employee, Mlle. Bulette, around the parlor and familiarize her with our faro tables." Franz responded and walked over to Julia. "And Mlle. Bulette," Edouard said looking down at her with an enigmatic smile, "I do believe that our relationship will be profitable for both of us." He gave a small bow and then turned when he heard a woman's laughter from without the main parlor.

Julia had stood as well and she turned to see a young woman with golden blonde hair wearing a rose-pink dress that was elegant and that complemented her figure, walk into the parlor on the arm of a tall, handsome man. Julia noticed how D'Arcy's face lit up when he saw the woman and Julia felt as if she had swallowed a stone; it was Marie de Val.

"My beautiful cousin," D'Arcy said, reaching out and then holding both her hands as she smiled up at him. "You have just made the sun come out for me. But my dear, aren't you usually still asleep at this hour?'

Marie laughed, a laugh that reminded Julia of the chimes she had had hanging on her balcony, waiting, hoping for a breeze to stir them. Julia noticed that Marie quickly glanced at her and then, suddenly recognizing her, returned her gaze to Julia.

"You are Julia Bulette, are you not? You were one of the charity cases at the Couvent des Ursulines. I remember you." Marie did not smile; she did not care for Julia, she never had. Julia was a guttersnipe and had once called Marie many names in a disagreement over a game. Julia spoke words that Marie did not know but she was sure they were insulting. So Marie had asked the nuns what the words meant and then, when asked where she heard such words, Marie told them that Julia had called her those names. And Julia was punished for her vile and vulgar language, had her palms smacked five times with a thin rod by the nuns and sent to bed without dinner. And Julia, the child, hated Marie who had the perfect nose and the golden pigtails and was the pet of the nuns. Even when Marie had torn her dress by climbing up one of the trees to peek at the men and women outside the convent carrying on their secular lives, she was not punished except to be denied desert that evening at dinner.

"Yes, I am Julia Bulette." Julia flushed with shame. Now Edouard would know that she had been an urchin, had been educated on the charity of the church and might pity her and of the whole gamut of emotions, pity was the one that Julia despised the most.

"Oh," Edouard said, smiling. "Well, ma chere, Mlle. Bulette is going to be one of my faro dealers. Is that to your approval?"

Marie smiled up at Edouard; she could not be bothered about this woman of the streets. "It is of no concern to me-I never play faro." And she laughed accompanied by Edouard and the man with her. "But the reason I have come to visit you so early, mon cousin, is to introduce you to Jean DeMarigny-again. He is back from his school in France."

"Ah, yes. I felt you were familiar. I remember you as a young boy. Welcome back to New Orleans. Your mother must be delighted at your return." And at that, Julia was forgotten as the three of them, Marie in the middle with her arms through the men's, walked back to D'Arcy's private quarters. Julia looked after them with envy and longing.

"Mlle.," Franz said, "please, come with me." And Julia went with him to learn the necessities of her job.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

Months passed. Julia did well in her new job and one night as she came home from the gambling parlor, Julia saw a light on in her apartment from the street below. She knew that she hadn't left a light on-she went to work at three in the afternoon, so she cautiously opened the door and joy flooded her; Ben Cartwright was sitting in the large chair in her room and he rose to meet her as Julia flung herself into his arms.

"Oh, Julia, Julia," Ben whispered as he kissed her hair and her neck and held her to him. She cried, she was so happy. And their bodies, so close together in the embrace, longed for each other and so, yearning with desire, they spent what was left of the night in each other's arms.

In the darkness, they talked, Ben telling her how eager he was to sign on with his new captain and how glad he was to have found her again. He had gone to the seaside bar and the bartender told him that she was now working in the grandest gambling salon in New Orleans but that she still lived upstairs and so he let Ben into her room to wait. Ben said that he had been tempted to go to the Palais de la Chance but knew that they wouldn't let in a mere sailor. But had he not known where she stayed, he would have braved it and although he was certain that he would have been forcibly ejected, at least he would have seen her and she would know that he was there, waiting for her. But his fear, he revealed to her in a low voice, was that since he had been away, she had found another man, someone else whom she loved.

Julia raised herself on one elbow to look down into his honest eyes and swore to Ben that she would love him eternally; there would never, could never, be another man to take his place in her heart. And Ben pulled her down to him and kissed her deeply and his heart was content in the security of their love.

Every morning brought a new day to Ben and Julia and they reveled in their youthful love, in the pleasures of the body and the soul. One morning, after they had lain together, Julia teased Ben about the hair curling around his ears and the nape of his neck.

"You look like a small boy whose mother doesn't want to lose her darling's curls." She ran her fingers through the curly dark hair, almost black but even as young as he was, already beginning to show strands of grey.

"I suppose," Ben said, looking down at her and caressing her cheek, "that I should visit a barber before my new captain orders me to look more like a man and less like a boy." Ben didn't want yet to reveal that New Orleans was not going to be a usual stop for the ship; they were based in Boston and that is where he would be spending most of his time off the ship. He hoped that before he had to leave, he could convince Julia to head for Boston; there they could start their life before they married and traveled out west to the brave new world. Perhaps, she would even marry him before he left New Orleans.

"Here," Julia said, rising from the bed and putting on a thin wrapper. "Come out onto the balcony and I'll cut your hair."

"You?" Ben asked incredulously.

"Yes," Julia said, laughing. "Better I cut your hair than you be scalped by one of your Indians in the west or a native on some foreign soil-they may take your whole beautiful head and shrink it! I don't know why you talk about going out there, to the west. Here in New Orleans is where life is. Everything here has a glow, a patina to it that exists nowhere else. This is where we can make our life together, Ben. Here in this city." Ben remained silent. "Now, put on your pants and bring the vanity chair with you," Julia said, grabbing up her scissors, a comb, a towel and opening the French doors that led to the balcony with its wrought iron railing.

Ben sat down and Julia draped the towel about his shoulders. As she clipped Ben's hair, they laughed as the light breeze blew the cut hair in the air and over the railing and moved the chimes she had hanging on her porch.

Julia cut one lock and handed it to Ben. "Hold this for me," she said. "I want it for my locket, to wear next to my heart." Ben turned and looked up at her and she bent down and quickly kissed him and laughed. Ben smiled up at her and Julia felt that his heart-shaped face exposed completely the love in the heart in his chest.

"Hopefully, you'll end up with more of me than just a lock of hair," he said. And Julia hoped she would as well. She had been considering how she would tell Ben of her plans and although she knew that Ben would be against them at first, if he loved her, if Ben loved her as much as he proclaimed, he would agree.

Julia enjoyed playing house with Ben and he enjoyed the time that she wasn't working and was at home. On her day off, they went to the shops and Ben purchased new gowns for Julia; she was reluctant to accept the finery from him but Ben insisted; he wanted her to wear clothing that was worthy of being on her lovely body. So Julia went into work the next day wearing a gown of watered blue silk and her teardrop pearl earrings. Ben had admired her before she left the apartment, telling her that as usual, he would be waiting outside to walk her home when her day was complete.

Julia was working at her faro table. She had become adept at cards, drawing a doublet more times than normal odds allowed and thereby winning half the stakes back for the house. Julia had won the admiration of Franz and most importantly, of D'Arcy himself. She had found that there was a trick to working with D'Arcy; he was constantly watching her and giving her an approving nod. But once she was out from behind the oval table, he would pat her on the rear or find a way to rub up against her. The trick was to ignore him and not to take him seriously, but now he was becoming more forward, more aggressive and Julia began to worry. Just yesterday, he had pinched her breast and when she impulsively slapped his hand away, he raised his chin and told her that she would not keep her position if she ever raised her hand to him again and then he walked away and was soon laughing with a group of men at one of his gambling tables within a time of perhaps half a minute. But Julia knew that he meant what he had said. She had considered telling Ben but she knew that if she did, Ben would confront D'Arcy and her position would be lost. D'Arcy wouldn't tolerate being confronted by her lover.

Julia was learning more at the gambling parlor than just how to deal faro or how to change the luck of a man who was winning far too much money. Julia's great beauty could distract a man so that he would not notice the change of a card and she knew just how to bend so that a man's gaze would stay riveted on her while his mind wandered to possibilities and make him forget his bets. And she also enjoyed the money that men gave her as a tip after they had won, never as much as they had hoped to win, but enough to be generous to the beautiful dealer. So when D'Arcy called her into his office and offered to give her a portion of the house's take, her heart began to pound; her dreams were manifesting. The only thing D'Arcy asked was that Julia be his mistress. Yes or no; he demanded an answer then and there. If no, he said, as he sat at his desk, she could continue to deal faro but he reminded her that she had a chance at greater things. He would never make the offer again, he said.

Julia stood perfectly still, her logical mind quickly considering the choices. Ben was shipping out in another two days and she would not see him for many months. He had told her of Boston being the home port and had been trying to convince her to move north; he would send her more money, he said. Julia wanted to go but somehow, she knew that she wouldn't belong in Boston; those people were not hers. Julia made up her mind and raised her hand to touch the locket that held a lock of Ben Cartwright's hair. "Forgive me, Ben," she said silently to herself. She smiled and D'Arcy smiled back. Then Julia pulled her dress off over her head, wordlessly giving D'Arcy her answer.


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4**

Ben smiled, his cap in his hand as Julia walked out of the parlor; he noticed immediately how tired she looked when she passed under the streetlamp. She smiled weakly at him and then, when she reached him and he embraced her, she dropped her head on his chest as he put his arms protectively around her.

"A rough day, sweetheart?" Ben asked as he kissed her hair. Despite the perfume Julia used, when she left the gambling parlor, her hair always smelled like cigar smoke. "I wish you wouldn't work there anymore," he said. She glanced at him and he responded by putting his arm around her as they began to walk back to the apartment. "But enough of that. I have something I want to talk to you about."

Julia raised her head and looked up at him; he couldn't know already about her and D'Arcy—he couldn't. The only ones who knew were Marie De Val and Jean DeMarigny and that was only because the couple had walked in on the two of them as they lay wrapped together sweating on D'Arcy's office couch. Marie had gasped at the sight of Julia's legs around D'Arcy's waist and Jean had immediately pulled her out of the room. Julia had heard Marie sputtering to her companion in French about how Julia had always been street trash and was no better than a common whore who walked the French quarter looking for sailors to roll. And D'Arcy, upon hearing what Marie had said as well, had laughed and told Julia that for months now, he had been trying to debauch his young cousin and now he had unintentionally done so. And Julia had laughed at the joke as well but she was bothered-and embarrassed. And now Ben wanted to discuss something and Julia was afraid.

"Let's go home first," Julia said, leaning into Ben as they walked together, his arm around her. "I want a bath-it's so very hot."

"I tell you what," Ben said. "I'll draw a bath for you and I'll even wash your back. How's that?" He grinned, leaned over and kissed the top of her head.

Julia gently chuckled. "That would be heaven, Ben."

And Ben was as good as his word. He filled the tub for her. Even though Julia's apartment was small and inexpensive, it did have running water and the cistern in the bar below that supplied the water to the bar also supplied her. And as Julia lowered herself into the warm water, Ben was there and not only did her wash her back, he took down her hair and washed that as well. Julia felt herself relax under his strong fingers as they massaged her scalp. Now she felt clean enough to be with Ben-her conscience as well as her body seemed to be cleansed by the bathwater.

The next day, Ben had to go see his new captain, Captain Stoddard, who, if what he had told Ben was accurate, would be waiting for him at the Black Devil bar. Ben didn't want Julia to go-he said for her to rest, but what he left unsaid was that he feared that one of the men in the bar she had known before and he would want her again-and that Ben could not allow. So Julia busied herself with straightening the apartment and then she went to the market and bought some fresh fish to grill and some okra and onions to pan fry in saved bacon drippings and a cool cantaloupe for dessert. She was rinsing the okra, the fish popping in the skillet, when Ben came home.

He sat down heavily, the sweat running down his face. He wiped his face off with his handkerchief.

"What's the news?" she asked.

"Well, I waited but Captain Stoddard never showed. I asked the bartender if he had seen Captain Stoddard and the man asked my name and when I told him, he gave me this." Ben pulled an envelope from his pocket. "It's a wire-Captain Stoddard said that he'll be another two months. They've been delayed"

Julia smiled and sat down in Ben's lap, laughing and kissing him. "So you'll be mine for another two months," she said, kissing him.

"That's the only good thing about this," he laughed, "but at least I have a job until then."

"What?" Julia looked at him incredulously. "What job do you have?"

"In talking to the bartender, I found they needed an 'enforcer.' The bartender said that I can start tonight. Now," he said, tweaking her nose, "I will no longer be a kept man-I will be able to contribute to our little household." And they laughed together.

And Julia went to work every afternoon as usual and once a week, sometimes twice, D'Arcy would call Julia to his office and more times than not, she was only asked to drop to her knees. The irony of her convent upbringing and the many times she was coerced to drop to her knees to pray or receive a slap on the palm, and the times she was coerced to drop to her knees here, was not lost on her. But other times when D'Arcy called for her, they would talk business. He showed Julia how to keep the books and that became her main job although she still worked at the faro table; she was too talented to be taken away from the table completely. But D'Arcy warned her to never steal from him-he would find out and she would pay the price for her financial indiscretion by becoming "food for the crabs that dance sideways around the bottom of the gulf." And he laughed at his threat when he saw Julia blanch.

Finally, the time came for Ben to meet with Stoddard. He didn't know how long the meeting would take so he and Julia agreed that they would meet at the Place D'Armes-the name by which the French population still called it, or Jackson Square. Julia kissed Ben goodbye and after eating a light breakfast, she had no appetite lately, Julia walked over to Jackson Square with her parasol open and waited for Ben.

As she was sitting, she heard a man's voice behind her. "You are the most beautiful women I have ever seen-even from the back."

Julia turned on the bench and looked up into Ben's smiling face.

"Come, sit with me and tell me about your meeting," Julia said, patting the bench; she pulled her skirts in to make room for him. Ben sat, half turned, and then he held her by the forearms and kissed her. Julia let her head fall on his chest as he wrapped her in his arms. Then she looked up at him, caressing his face. "Oh, Ben," she said, "I love you so."

"Good," Ben said, "because I have something to ask you." Julia sat up and looked at Ben questioningly. Her heart began to thump and her pulse quickened. Ben dropped to one knee before the bench and held Julia's gloved hands. "Julia, my love, will you marry me?"

Julia stared, openmouthed; she didn't know what to say and her mind raced.

Ben smiled at her shocked expression. "You don't have to marry me right this very moment," Ben said, with a small laugh, "not that I would protest, but I leave in two days, Thursday morning, and if you'll give me your answer tomorrow night, hopefully, yes, we'll make plans."

"But, Ben…" Julia was beginning to feel panicky. She loved Ben but she didn't want to leave New Orleans-not yet. Things were becoming highly lucrative for her and her bank account was growing.

Ben stood up and taking both her hands in his, pulled Julia off the bench, laughing. "Well, I didn't mean to terrify you." And then his face softened. "But you must know, my love, how I feel about you, how much I adore you and, Julia, oh, my darling, ma chere, I love you so." He leaned down to kiss her and Julia felt her head spin. He was so overwhelmingly male, so handsome and his mouth was warm and soft. She felt she would faint. She leaned against him, needing his support.

"Julia, are you all right?" Ben was concerned. "Let's get out of this heat. We'll go sit in a café and talk. Is that to your liking?"

Julia looked up at him. "Yes. Yes, that would be nice. It's the heat." And then, partially turning her head, she saw a man and a woman standing a few yards away, watching her with Ben. It was Marie De Val and the handsome young man, Jean DeMarigny. Marie had brought him many times into D'Arcy's salon and he had been with Marie when she had seen Julia and D'Arcy together.

"Come, Ben," Julia said, grabbing his arm. "Let's go now. Please."

Ben looked down at Julia and saw panic in her eyes; she must be more ill than he thought, so quickly, they walked another block to a small café where they could sit under the awning and have a cool drink.

The next day, Julia was restless and Ben was concerned. He decided to ease her mind so he pulled her into his arms as he sat in the large chair in Julia's apartment. "My goodness," he said, "you're like a small child in my arms, a little bird."

"Hopefully not a plain bird," Julia said and Ben laughed.

"What kind of bird would you like to be? You can't be a peacock because the females are so plain." Ben kissed the tip of her nose.

"I choose to be a phoenix." Julia traced Ben's gentle lips with her finger.

"A phoenix? Why?"

"So I can be reborn again into a new Julia as many times as need be."

"But this is the Julia I love," Ben said quietly. "I don't want you to be anything else but this."

Julia wanted to tell Ben that his love for her had made him a fool. She was changing right before his eyes and he couldn't see it-or refused to see it. She put her arms around his neck and kissed him. Then she said that she had to dress for work and Ben sat and smoked his pipe while he watched Julia put on her rouge and brush the kohl on her lashes and to dress. Her every movement thrilled him and he sighed with satisfaction. He would wait for her answer to his proposal.

"Julia," Franz said as she entered the salon and went to her faro table to set up her desk and bank, "M. D'Arcy would like to see you."

"Oh," Julia said, becoming nervous. "Merci." She walked into the back and knocked on D'Arcy's door.

"Entrez," he answered.

Julia walked in and D'Arcy was approaching her. "Franz said that you…" And that was all she had time to say before D'Arcy's hand shot out and slapped her across her face. She fell back against the door, putting her hand up to her cheek. Her neck was sore from the snapping of her head after she was struck.

D'Arcy stood over her after she slid to the floor. His cool demeanor was gone, had evaporated, and in his face, Julia saw a murderous rage. "Did you think I wouldn't find out? That I wouldn't learn that you have been seen arm in arm with a common sailor, probably sleeping with a vulgar, stinking sailor! What do you take me for?" D'Arcy walked back to his desk and sat down, lighting a small, thin cigar and smoking to calm his nerves.

Julia pulled herself up and stood before D'Arcy. Marie, Julia thought, that "salope", has told D'Arcy about Ben. And Julia swore to herself that she would avenge herself against Marie. She did not yet know how but she would but one day she would. But unknown to Julia, it had not been Marie who had informed D'Arcy of Julia's lover; it had been one of the female croupiers who was envious of D'Arcy's show of favoritism toward Julia and of her great beauty who had told D'Arcy that she had seen Julia Bulette on the arm of a common sailor, kissing him and almost making love to him in the park. For her information,the croupier received a gold coin which she dropped inside her bodice for safe-keeping.

Nevertheless, Julia was certain it was Marie. Therefore, a few years later, once Julia had established herself as the owner of a small gambling salon, D'Arcy came to her and asked if she knew someone who, for a small fee-or a larger one-would participate in a "prank' on Marie DeMarigny and her husband, Jean. Julia gave him a name of a man who owed her a sum of money. D'Arcy thanked her generously with many pieces of gold and told her that he and Madame DeMarigny, Jean DeMarigny's mother, would be eternally in her debt.

But now, Julia stood frightened; she didn't know what to do but then, as her mind calmed, she knew; she would make it seem as if Ben's leaving was her idea. "I didn't know that you would care," she said to D'Arcy. "But I will be rid of him, if that pleases you."

"Either you get rid of him and have no other lover but me, or I will have your throat cut for making a fool of me. Do you understand, Julia?"

"Yes," she said coldly, "I understand." And she turned to leave to put cool water on the red mark on her face. She would never forget this, she told herself. Never. And she never did. And months before she left New Orleans to go out west, to find Ben Cartwright and destroy him, she owned the Palais de la Chance and had changed the name to Julia's Palace. Edouard D'Arcy wasted away in his bed, the victim of a mysterious disorder. It was rumored that his own cook had been bribed to slowly poison him, more than likely with arsenic. But nothing came of it; the cook could not be found to be questioned having left New Orleans quickly during the night that D'Arcy took his last, desperate breath.

~ 0 ~

Julia worked the rest of her shift and hid any residual redness with powder but although her face no longer stung, the sting of the slap, of her feeling of helplessness stayed with her and that night, Ben wasn't waiting for her. Julia pulled her cape tightly around her and even though the night was warm, she felt chilled. She rushed home through the empty streets growing more and more desperate every moment. She soon was home and looked up-a light was on in her apartment. She rushed up the stairs and out of breath, opened the door. Ben sat on the edge of her bed, his duffle bag at his feet. He turned his head to face her when she rushed in. He stood up and Julia stopped.

"Ben, I was worried. You weren't there tonight-I was afraid you had already left." She threw her cape over a chair.

"A man came by tonight and gave me this." Ben held out a letter. Julia took it from him and with shaking hands, she unfolded it and read it. "Is it true, Julia?" he asked. "Is it? Are you that man's mistress?"

Julia looked up at Ben. She couldn't decipher his expression. He looked angry and yet there was a tinge of sadness about him. She was unaware she was looking at a broken heart.

"Ben, I did it for us. He's giving me a part of the house's earnings. I'll save the money and then we'll use it to travel out west, to buy the land you want."

"Oh, Julia." Ben turned away, the tears stinging his eyes. "How could you. You said you loved me."

She held onto his arm, trying to turn him to look at her. If he looked at her he would be able to see how much she loved him; she had to make him understand. "I do love you, Ben. I do. He just has my body but you have my heart. That's what's most important. You have my heart and always will. It's not mine anymore now, my heart is yours. That's something D'Arcy will never own. I love you, Ben, only you."

Ben shrugged off her hand and picked up his duffle. "Julia, I can't…it may be nothing to you, to open your body to another man, but I can't live with it. Goodbye, Julia." Ben walked out the door and Julia could hear his footsteps as he quickly descended the narrow staircase.

She ran back inside and threw open the French doors and leaned out over her balcony. "Ben!" she cried out to him. "Ben, please! Come back! Oh please, Ben, come back!" but if he heard her, he never looked up or even slowed his pace. Julia collapsed on the cold tile of the balcony and sobbed. For a few seconds, she considered throwing herself off the balcony and lying broken on the brick street below to end the pain of his abandonment but Julia's mind wouldn't long stay in this mode-her survival skills were too great. Julia literally pulled herself up using the iron rails of the balustrade and went back inside. She lay on the bed, crying and suddenly she was gripped by a stabbing pain in her abdomen. It was so acute that it took away her breath. She drew her knees up and doubled over. The pain kept coming as if her intestines were being twisted, tied in knots. Then she felt a stickiness between her thighs and with a groan of pain, blood flowed from her and all alone, Julia Bulette went through the miscarriage of Ben Cartwright's child.

Julia stayed alone for a week; the intense pain had lasted two days but finally it waned and eventually, she stopped passing clots of blood and the flow tapered off to become manageable. One of the girls from the gambling salon came to check on Julia and why she had not shown to work. Julia the woman was a spy for D'Arcy, come to see if the sailor had left. She helped Julia to clean up and prepared her tea and toast and then she left. Julia wondered what D'Arcy would be told.

The first morning she felt well enough, Julia went to the Haitian section of New Orleans to Mama Manette, a priestess. Julia gave her two silver coins and the lock of Ben's hair she had kept and Mama Manette let loose a curse on Ben. Julia wanted him to know what it was like to lose someone he loved and to suffer broken heart after broken heart. She wanted Ben to feel the pain that he had given her, left her to deal with all alone and Mama Manette assured Julia that he would suffer—he would suffer thrice times over.


	5. Chapter 5

**Part 5**

And here it was, over ten years since Julia had last seen Ben and her heart and her body had responded to him just as it had the first time so many years ago. Although it had not been too easy, Julia had finally won him to her bed again and, she hoped, won his heart back as well. But Ben was dressing to leave, was going to go and leave her again and she didn't know how she could bear it a second time.

Earlier that evening, Julia had been walking about her gambling parlor, not as grand as D'Arcy's gambling salon, but she had become an independent business woman and was catching up with D'Arcy in patronage. Just the month before, she had needed to move to a larger place and now she was established just one block south of La Palais de Chance; the southern side was closer to the docks and that made it less prestigious but Julia didn't worry. Soon, she was sure, she would be able to move north, even perhaps to own D'Arcy's Palais but for now, she was content.

Marius Angeville had entered her salon with another man and Julia had just glanced at them and then she caught her breath-Ben Cartwright was the other man. She had heard that he was in New Orleans and had hoped to see him but now he was really there-flesh and blood.

Ben had considered long and hard if he should visit the now-notorious Julia Bulette's gambling establishment. After Ben and Marius Angeville's light dinner at his home and while they were relaxing over a snifter of brandy, Ben asked Marius if he knew of a woman named Julia Bulette. Marius had sat back, surprised. "Yes," he said, "I know Julia. She used to work for D'Arcy-quite the beauty. I used to play faro at her table. Men never won that much but just being able to look at that angelic face was worth the money. One time I offered her an extra coin for a kiss and to be honest, I would have paid far more to press my lips against hers. And Julia, well, she was quite the darling-always kind to me. I heard that she opened her own place -now where is it? Julia moved her gambling salon recently-I have heard but my memory, it isn't so good anymore although the bad things, those I remember. I assume that you know Julia, or knew her."

Ben flushed. "Yes. I knew her once…years ago when my ship used to drop anchor in New Orleans but I haven't seen her, in, oh-must be twelve years now. I was just wondering how she was. I used to be quite fond of her."

Marius smiled. "No, Ben. I was 'fond' of her. You, as the young man you are and were, had to have been much more than just 'fond'."

Ben couldn't meet Marius' eyes. "That's true. I cared for her a great deal and I'm afraid, well, I'm sure that I was…cruel. I've learned so much in the interim, learned how to forgive others, how not to hold everyone to the New England standards of behavior for women with which I was raised and I've learned how to…how to really love."

"Well," Marius said, rising from his over-soft chair and straightening his spine, his hands placed on his lower back, "My driver will know where Julia's Palace is. Let's dress and go out for the evening. Just be ready to lose some money." And Marius winked at Ben who smiled back.

Together, the two men walked into Julia's Palace and Ben, his heart pounding, scanned the room until he saw Julia. She was even more beautiful than he remembered, the years only having made her lovelier and she had a certain maturity, a certain confidence she exuded as she wandered from table to table, laughing with the patrons or taking aside a dealer or croupier to reprimand him or to give him advice on certain patrons at the table. Julia often pulled a dealer aside to let them in on a secret about the person with whom they were playing. Julia had earned the reputation of being business-savvy and also cold-hearted. No one could get the better of Julia Bulette; many had tried and lost more than just money; she was a dangerous adversary.

So Ben's and Julia's eyes met and neither dropped their gaze. Julia felt as if she had the wind knocked out of her but she had learned long ago not to physically react no matter what emotion she was feeling. So for a slight second, her face may have shown shock or sadness but no one could have noticed, it was so fleeting.

Julia sauntered over to the two men who both took off their hats. "Good, evening, Marius," Julia said, kissing him on the cheek. "Hello, Ben. You look well." Julia stood, a small smile on her face.

"Well," Marius said, looking back and forth at the two people who seemed unaware he was even there, "I do believe that I have some money to lose." And he left them.

"Julia, you look beautiful," Ben said.

"Thank you, Ben. You look well yourself." She reached out and ruffled his curls around his ears. "Your hair's greyer but other than that, you look as handsome as always." Julia had heard from D'Arcy that a man by the name of Ben Cartwright had come to New Orleans to sell his furs and to comfort D'Arcy's poor, innocent cousin, his darling Marie, with her husband's last words. And they both had laughed but Julia felt empty and D'Arcy had commented on the flush of her cheeks at the news. Julia put it down to the bourbon-she so rarely drank. And then Julia offered some gossip to D'Arcy before she brought it back around to Marie; she wanted to learn how long this man, this Ben Cartwright was staying and where. After all, it was she, Julia, who had provided the man to play the "prank" on the DeMarignys-had a man slip into Marie's bed so that when her husband arrived home he would see his beloved wife in bed with another man and so she felt she had a right to know what Jean's last words to his wife were. When D'Arcy said that it was that he forgave her for her indiscretion, they laughed again. Julia had kept the pretense of a friendship with D'Arcy; it was beneficial to her. He was privy to all the secrets of the wealthy and both he and she had managed to reap rewards from men who had been caught in romantic indiscretions and gladly paid to have it kept a secret.

"Julia," Ben had asked quietly, "May I talk with you?"

"Of course, Ben, but not now-I have a business to run. If you'd like to stay and spend some money until closing, that's fine. I'll be able to talk to you then. Go join Marius. I'll have a complimentary bottle of my best champagne brought to the table."

"All right, Julia. I'll stay until then, but I have to confess, I've never been one for gambling."

"Yes, I know," Julia said before she turned away. "You like the sure thing, don't you? You're not willing to take a chance on anything."

Ben stood, his mouth slightly open; he knew what Julia meant.

At closing time, Julia looked around and Ben was gone. She smiled to herself, chastising herself for her naivety. Telling the bartender good night and to lock up, Julia walked out into the darkness and there, waiting for her was Ben Cartwright. She stopped and then, composing herself, walked over to him.

"Well, Ben, what a surprise. I thought you had left with Marius."

"No, Julia, I came to walk you home."

"Walk me home?" Julia laughed. "I have my own driver waiting-right there." She raised one elegant arm, a diamond bracelet glittering in the moonlight, and gestured to a small, waiting carriage. "Would you care for a ride home?" She pulled her cape closer around her. The evenings were beginning to become chilly and the suffocating humidity was receding.

"I thought we could talk," Ben said.

"Of course," Julia said as the driver climbed down to help her in. "We can talk in the carriage."

And Ben agreed but they ended up in Julia's lush apartments, and their passion for each other was renewed with an initial kiss. And now Ben was leaving her again, going off to his other life and Julia didn't think she could bear it, especially since he may very well be going to Marie DeMarigny.

"And I suppose that you think that Marie is beautiful," Julia said, rising from the bed and putting on her wrap.

"Yes. I do," Ben said. "I'm not blind, Julia."

"And I suppose you also think that she is pure and good. I suppose you don't know about how her husband found her in their bed with another man, rolling around and enjoying each other."

"I'm just here to deliver a message to her from her husband, a brave man who saved my life." Ben stood looking at Julia and he felt guilty. He had given in to his passions, to his lust but this was not the Julia he had known and he supposed that he was not the Ben that she knew. But how could they be the same? And he sensed déjà vu, the feeling that he and she had played out this very scene before.

"Is that all?" Julia asked. "You're just an errand boy, delivering a message that could have been put in a mailed note? "

"I promised Jean DeMarigny that I would tell his wife and his mother in person of his death. I swore to it as it was his last request." Ben looked down at his hat that he held in his hand. Then he looked back at Julia, her brown hair falling about her shoulders. "I've learned much, Julia, but obviously not enough. I never learned how to resist you. I was cruel to you, Julia, all those years ago. I was selfish and cruel and for that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come here tonight, should never have looked for you-but I had hoped that we could be reconciled-as old friends. I'm sorry, Julia." Ben turned to leave, to pass into the outer room of her apartment that was filled with elaborate furniture-expensive antiques.

Julia gave a bizarre laugh and Ben turned back and looked at her quizzically. "Oh, Ben-you are still foolish. Do you think I care? Do you think that after all these years, I still love you? You haven't changed, Ben-you're still a fool."

Ben looked at her, not knowing what to make of her comment but turned and continued on his way out, Julia following.

"Let me tell you something, Ben," Julia said, standing her ground, "I never forget an insult done to me. Never. And I always even the score, no matter how long it takes, I always do. You had best start looking behind you, Ben. You hurt me, destroyed that young Julia Bulette that I was many years ago and she demands revenge. And I will see that she is avenged. Always look behind you, Ben. Be ever vigilant."

Ben stared at her and he felt a chill run down his spine. He opened the door and a man was just about to take a hold of the knob on the other side. Ben and the man, a big man, stared at each other.

"Excuse me," Ben said. He turned one last time to look at Julia-she was so very beautiful, he thought, and then he put on his hat and left.

The man came in and threw his hat on a Louis XIV brocade chair, and in a French accent, he said, "Don't tell me that you have gone back to whoring, Julia, ma petite chou." he walked over to the bottle of wine Julia had opened for her and Ben and poured himself a glass. He sat on another chair and sipped the wine.

Julia looked at him. John Millain had become a bother to her but when he was gone, in some perverse way she couldn't understand, she missed him. Maybe because he understood her so well and he had never abandoned her. Julia knew that he would be with her always; they were inextricably bound to one another by basically being the opposite genders of the same type of person—both far from admirable and both never doing anything that would not benefit them. "And don't tell me that you have gone back to drinking too much, John?"

Millain laughed. "Why Julia, I had never left it" And they both laughed but Julia's laugh was without humor because she was laughing at herself.

~ Finis ~


End file.
